Our most desperate hour?... or, A Call to Arms

We are at war.

I never realised this until a few weeks ago. Part of me wishes I had never found out, but ultimately I need this knowledge to fight. Reading back over my previous posts I can see it in a different light. I mistakenly said that the pain I have is coming from within me, that I am instrinsicly bad. I realise now that it is not so. I am under attack, my heart is being assaulted by an enemy that had convinced me that it was me. So I let it continue, I have done nothing to guard my heart, I have just let guilt and shame take hold and slowly strangle it. Now it just hurts, it feels bruised and empty.

Satan is taking us down from behind our own lines. We do so much to serve, to give, work, spend, to put out the word and battle Satan from world.

Like the Hyena after the lion, Satan can not beat us head on, he has no power against somebody full in faith. But the hyena keeps the lion running, taunting it, exhasuting it until it is weak and defenceless. Then it moves in for the kill.

He's flanked us, and is currently smashing through our rear-guard, exposing our protected core. And I never saw it coming.

I feel like Neo. Eyes open, truth revealed. Enlightened but seemingly helpless. All I suspected was out there is suddenly real, but more than I ever could imagine. The bad as well as the good.

I know now that Satan is trying to capture my heart, to take away my ability to love... I have been becoming like the Tin man from The Wizard of Oz. So much of me has been taken away as making me a more efficient person, a better technician, problem solver, bass player... It's like a trap you slowly climb into and close over the top of you. It's like the frog on the hob.

But it doesn't have to be like this. Jesus came to give us life, to set the captive free. Freedom. I don't think any other work carries the weight of freedom.

Keep us running, that way we'll never take care of our hearts, We'll get weak and tired, then fall into old ways and temptation, and then we are open to defeat.

That's the enemies strategy. You have to take care of your heart. In it rests the original glory of God, forget original sin, thats a weapon of the devil. We are made in God's image, there is no sin in His image. Jesus opened the way to restore that Glory, and if we nuture it then we cannot lose.

I need to learn about walking with God, receiving his intimate counsel for deep restoration. To restore my heart to what he made it to be. I don't fully understand this but I know i have to submit to allow it to happen.

I just need prayer for strength against attack, because at the moment I am too weak to fight for myself...

Look around yourself though, the enemy is there. Guard your heart, please, with everything you have because it is the key to surviving the battle.

Awake from your sleep, cast off the Veil of Familiarty, open the eyes of your heart. Arise and shine...